Hell week...... I mean, Hello exam week!

I think that colleges came up with "Finals Week" just so the students have a reason to complain about everything and freak out, and stress out more than they have the entire semester.... Because that's exactly what happens. The semester starts out so nice, there's a steady amount of work, and it increases through out the weeks... then all of a sudden, BAM! It's a week before Thanksgiving break and all of your teachers think that writing papers and studying for exams is more important to do than spend time with your family over the holiday. (which, I suppose for some people, it's an excuse to get away from their family!) So then Thanksgiving break happens, which is a welcome break for all (Especially those of us who live in Lumberton...) Thanksgiving break consists of writing papers, doing research for papers, and studying for the upcoming tests. Finals. The word alone can stop a college student dead in their tracks. A week of hell, basically. Late night studying, eating food that the food pyramid would be ashamed of, and drinking more caffeine than any person ever should.

Thanksgiving was wonderful. I went home to Wilmington and spent Thursday in Rocky Point with the family... Friday I spent with my mom running around Wilmington in the Black Friday craziness like FOOLS! Saturday I spent 6 hours at Port City Java writing a 15 page paper.... which was exactly what I wanted to do.... NOT! I was entirely too caffeinated once I got back to my mom's... She wasn't real thrilled with the hyper-activity either. (Oh well!)

I came back to Lumberton early Sunday afternoon and worked on another paper and a power point presentation that I had due.... Monday after class I was held hostage in the education lab (computer lab for the education majors) by my friend Mary so that I could help her with all of her papers and study for an exam. Today (well, Tuesday)... was the big day. Two HUGE BIG GIGANTIC ENORMOUS (you get the idea?) papers were due at 2pm, and 5pm. For my 2pm class, I also had to give a presentation. In between, in my 3:15 class, we had our FINAL exam.

Sigh.

Needless to say, at 6:30pm when my last class ended... I could not get to my car fast enough!

Of course, I should have walked a little slower... in a hurry to get to my car, all to go home and write up lesson plans that are due for tomorrow (Wednesday) and start on filling out my study guide for my history final.

6 days left of the semester, 1 exam down, 5 to go!

What part of Butter Biscuit did you not understand?

So, as you all know, I've described a few of the lovely encounters that I've had over the past couple of months while living in Robeson County. 
I went home this past weekend, and my mom mentioned this particular story to me, and I realized that it was blog worthy, and that my amazing Southern friends would really appreciate it. 


October 28, I got up extremely early to take the Praxis I in Fayetteville. My mom had come up the night before and was going with me. We decided to stop at Hardee's on our way out of town to grab something quick for breakfast. 
This Hardee's was a little abnormal from the majority of the others I had been to before... (mainly because it's in Lumberton...) The drive-thru was set up all weird, at the front end of the store, and for it being 7am, there were a ton of people in line. I made the comment that we should have gone inside after waiting 10 minutes.... but it was too late, we had already ordered. Bacon egg and cheese for mom, BUTTER biscuit for me, and a small coke. Finally the car in front of us was at the window and the food had passed from the window and into their car. 5 minutes later, they were still there, TALKING to an employee (perhaps about the weather?) through the window. After realizing that they were holding up the line, they drove off and we were at the window.


Here's where we realized this was a bad mistake... 
1. The total for our 2 biscuits and small drink was almost $7. (I knew that this was wrong)
2. The man at the window wanted to confirm our order, so he said, "You have a Steak and Egg biscuit, a butter biscuit, and small sprite?"
---NO! I told him the correct order, and 5 minutes later we got our bag. 
3. I drive off.... not out of the parking lot (I've learned) I tell mom to check my biscuit to make sure there is butter on the inside of it. 
4. No butter on the BUTTER biscuit. 
.....Excuse me?


That morning I was not in the mood for being messed with. And certainly not with my biscuit. Especially since Hardee's is one of the ONLY places I will eat butter biscuits from. (Chickfila- not in Lumberton, and Biscuitville-Also not in Lumberton). 


I decide to whip into a parking place, grab the biscuit, and march into the place and demand that they give me my BUTTER biscuit. 
I walked in, told the woman that I had ordered a BUTTER biscuit and that the biscuit I received has no butter inside. 
The woman looks at me, and says... "You wanted butter on it?"
....................................................................................................................
ARE YOU KIDDING ME LADY!?!?!?!?! YES I WANTED BUTTER ON MY BUTTER BISCUIT!


After seeing that I was going to be pretty adamant about this whole butter on my biscuit thing, she got me a new one, and I was on my way. 


Just a FYI for those Hardee's employees... when a Southern girl asks for a BUTTER biscuit. Make damn sure that there is butter inside of that biscuit. I would have hated to see my grandma's reaction to that. 


Maybe I've watched a few too many Paula Dean episodes.... but make sure the biscuit is buttered.... Or else. 
:) 

Thank you Oprah

First off, I've never been a huge fan of Oprah. Yes, I admire her for all the wonderful things that she has done for so many people all over the world. But it never failed that the one time I'd catch her show, it would be one of her "Oprah's biggest giveaways" where she basically hands out anything a woman (or person, for that matter) would want. The latest phones, computers, trips, etc... So of course, I also wanted all of these things, so it never seemed fair to me that I always hit the channel with that show on. 

This is her last year of her show, and Oprah has totally stepped up her game. What made me get interested in her, was an episode from a few weeks ago about child molestation. As horrible and terrifying as those crimes are, the show really stated a lot. Last week she had the entire original cast of the Sound of Music on. And being a huge fan of The Sound of Music, I loved it! 

Today, Portia de Rossi was on. She has just released her (I believe first) book entitled Unbearable Lightness: A Story of Loss and Gain. I plan on getting a copy of it ASAP... but one of the reasons I loved Oprah's interview with her was that it seemed to me that Portia was not there just to promote her book. It was a very raw and emotional interview that exposed Portia's darkest secrets. Not only did she live her live as a closeted lesbian, but she was also battling anorexia/bulimia/purging. She held nothing back concerning how she felt and how she saw herself through out those years. The Portia we all see today, happily married to Ellen DeGeneres, is the outcome of a vicious cycle of eating disorders and shame that molded her life. 

For anyone that has ever felt insecure about themselves or their body image; for anyone who has ever tried, attempted, or gone through with an eating disorder, this interview is a must see. I can speak from experience. I have gone through different cycles of anorexia a few times in my life. Each time, longing to learn something else, or to find what was actually going to make me happy in life. In each time that I went down this road, something tragic triggered it. When I was 13, a friend from church died. I couldn't handle his death because he was literally the only person who spoke to me at church youth group. Some people that were close to him decided to carry on his vegetarianism, so I joined in as well. Without knowing it, that was the moment I gave up this "normal" life that I was leading. I went from eating everything, to barely eating or drinking anything at all. I never got help at this point in my life, it was my cousin that helped me see what I was doing was crazy. Friendship and family got me through it. 

A few years later, in high school it happened again. I don't remember the exact moment that I felt insignificant, like no one cared...I just remember walking around New Hanover High School and feeling ugly, and fat and that no one even knew who I was because I was just so "plain jane". For me, this was short lived because of my best friend Lacey. She knew about what I had done and what had happened in middle school, and she saw what I was doing and jerked me out of the funk that I was in. 

In June of 2005, my Grandma Ann had a heart-attack and was gone instantly. Just like when I was 13, I couldn't handle it. All of a sudden my family was ripped apart. We relied on her for so much, and even though she would get on my nerves, a lot, I loved her so much and I needed her in my life. So, it began again. Lacey noticed the weight dropping, but it was summer and I appeased her by saying things like "come on Lace, It's bikini season I've got to look good!" or "I'm not losing weight, I swear, you know I would never do that to myself again." 

Right. One thing I've neglected to mention... tragedy brought on this sense of not being in control of my life. How could I be in control when obviously God was taking people away from me left and right. Yes, tragedy put me in this situation, but I kept myself there. It was part of my grieving process. Instead of crying in a room, I didn't eat. I felt guilty when I did eat. What I was putting in my body was the only thing I had control over, and that made my life "better". 

A month after my grandma died, I looked horrible. The person I was dating at the time, Matt,  saw it, Lacey had realized it was more than I was letting on to. So Matt told me straight up, "Tell your mom what's going on so she can get you some help, or I'm hanging up and calling her myself." With his help and support, I was able to tell my mom. I went to counseling sessions and saw a nutritionist to help me. And it did. 

5  years later, I still have some issues with weight. But I have come soo far from where I was in 2005. The fact that my jeans are size 8 doesn't make me want to puke anymore. I understand that my weight and the number on my clothes doesn't matter. What matters is that I'm healthy, and happy. When my father got sick in November of 2006, and in December when we realized that there was nothing that could be done, I made a promise to a good friend, Kevin that I wasn't going to go down the tragedy induced eating disorder again. And I'm very happy (and proud) to say that I haven't since then. When I met Cameron in December of 2007, I was at the smallest I've been in the past almost three years. I was still gaining the normal control over my weight and learning to lose the control over what I was and was not putting in my mouth. And I'm happy to say now, that I am perfectly healthy. My weight still fluctuates and it always will. I've been heavy, and I've been smaller. 

Today's Oprah episode solidified every feeling that I had going through those 3 times in my life. It made me see that I hadn't been alone, even though it had felt that way. I admire Portia so much for writing that book and doing the interview with Oprah. And I hope that every woman, young woman, girl, and teenage girls will see parts of it. Even more, I hope that for the women and girls that are going through the same thing now, will be able to see that there is hope. 

So, thanks Oprah, for the interview... and thank you also to Portia de Rossi for exposing yourself and your story to so many that needed that to be talked about.